What They Don’t Tell You In Orientation…

Those of you who have spent time in a culture that is different than your own can appreciate the navigation that Heidi and I have been doing for the past few months here in Nepal. I thought about this the other day after a meeting that did not happen exactly as I had planned. I scheduled this meeting at 1 o'clock and despite the crazy traffic, managed to arrive on time. Walking toward the person's office, I noticed that he was meeting with several other people. His office door was open so I strategically stood so that he could clearly see I had arrived. We made eye contact, but he did not ask me to wait or usher me in. So I decided to stand out of sight for a few minutes until the other people left. Ten minutes later, three more people had entered his office. He seemed to be holding several meetings at one time- none of which showed any signs of ending soon. Finally, I just walked in, which apparently is what I was supposed to do. We then proceeded to have a five minute "meeting" while the others watched (and periodically offered their opinions on our conversation).

Thinking about this experience on the way home, I jotted down a few other cultural lessons we've learned during our short time here. We waver between being appreciative of these norms and being annoyed- wanting to laugh and trying not to cry.

• It is bad luck for three people to leave a building at the same time. You should do whatever you can to make sure this does not happen.
  
• It is not appropriate for one person to watch while others are eating (unless, in some cases, that one person happens to be a woman). Even if that person is not hungry or does not particularly like the food that is being eaten, the person must participate in eating.
  
• You should always share the food you have with others, regardless of how little you have (or how much you really like your food and don't really want to share it).
  
• You must remain at work until the end of the day, even if there is no power (and therefore, nothing to do) for the last five hours of the workday. It is better to sleep or talk about Indian Idol than to leave work early.
  
• When answering the phone, if you say "Hello", the person on the other line will also say "Hello". This cycle could be repeated indefinitely. It is best to say "Hello" one time, followed by "Who would you like to speak to" in order to avoid the aforementioned cycle.
  
• Nepali's take the phrase "there is always room for one more" very literally, particularly when it comes to public transportation. Heidi and I once counted 31 people in a small van that was clearly designed to hold 12. This also applies to bikes and motorcycles.
  
• You always offer someone tea when they stop by your house or office. Even if they are only planning to be there for a few minutes, you always offer tea. Furthermore, if you are offered tea and the person doing the offering is also planning to have tea (which is usually the case), it is best to accept the offer, because even if you initially refuse, the person will offer so many times that you'll eventually give in.
  
• Related to the point above, you should always offer someone a chair, even if they just stopped by your office to pay a bill or are just browsing in a shop.
  
• When handing someone something, you offer it with your right hand, while placing your left hand at your right forearm.
  
• It is always appropriate to spit, even inside a public transportation vehicle filled with people (see earlier bullet).
  
• It is acceptable to ask people questions that could be considered personal (in other cultures), such as "what kind of birth control do you use?" or "how much money do you have in your bank account?" (and yes, we've been asked both of these questions).
  
• It is always appropriate to answer your cell phone. Always (voicemail doesn't exist here, which is one of the explanations for this phenomenon). Furthermore, when answering your phone, it's always appropriate to proceed to have a long conversation, even if you are in the middle of an important meeting. Leaving the room is optional.
  
• If you are able to string together five Nepali words that sort of make sense, you are deemed an expert (even if you don't know the Nepali word for "expert").
  
• Waiting patiently in line will ensure that you forever remain at the end of the line (in those cases where something resembling a line exists).
  
• If someone asks you a question and you don't know the answer to said question, it is better to offer some kind of answer (even if it's totally made up) than to admit that you don't know.
  

When driving, you should use the horn more often than the brakes.

Into the Jungle

Amos and I spent this past weekend in Chitwan, in the Terai region of Nepal. It is a place known for its mysterious jungles and exotic animals, and for its flat, open spaces and serene beauty.

We arrived Friday afternoon, after a bumpy, winding, 5-hour ride. More than happy to emerge from the crowded bus and uncrumple ourselves, we explored the little town of Sauraha, in search of a place to stay for the weekend. We found a lovely riverside resort with beautiful gardens and made ourselves at home in a little cottage.

On Friday night, we attended a Tharu Cultural Programme in town. The Tharus are an indigenous people group of Nepal, and many live on the outskirts of Sauraha in traditional clay homes with thatched roofs. We were mesmerized as much by the traditional dancing and music during the programme as by walking through the Tharu village. It was so idyllic, quiet, simply beautiful. After the programme, we enjoyed a late fireside dinner by the river...marveling at the peace and quiet surrounding us.

We woke up early to a very foggy, misty Saturday morning, and ventured down to the river for a canoe ride. This was our favorite part of the trip--the dreamy haze over the river, the sounds of birds calling, our guide quietly pointing out the different species of birds and their calls as we glided through the water. It felt so sacred, so unbelievably mystical. After an hour on the canoe, we went offshore, into the jungle. Here, our (impressively knowledgeable) guide continued to point out amazing varieties of birds, as well as evidence of tigers--fresh paw prints and claw markings on trees. We didn't see any large animals during our walk, but it was awing enough to know we were in their territory. I admit I was slightly nervous about running into a wild animal, but our guide seemed pretty calm...and carried a large bamboo stick.

Saturday afternoon was full of elephants. We watched the gigantic beasts getting their daily bath in the river. Although we could have, we didn't join in the bath--it was a bit too chilly, but some other tourists had fun getting splashed and scrubbing the elephants' rough skin. After a delicious lunch of momos and Himalayan tea at a hole-in-the-wall restaurant, we made our way back into the jungle, this time atop elephants.

Although we were crammed into a box seat with several other people, the ride was absolutely fabulous. For two hours, the elephants (about 6 or 7) thudded through the dense foliage, occasionally stopping to clear the path by pulling down saplings with their trunks--and eating them. We were thrilled to come upon rhinos--a mother and baby munching away on bushes while we all gawked and snapped pictures like good tourists. We saw another rhino later on, as well as some wild boar that were snacking on what looked like a fox. The rest of the evening was pretty uneventful, just enjoyed another fireside dinner together!

Unfortunately we had to leave fairly early Sunday morning, so after one more walk by the river, we packed up and headed to the bus park...But, due to a miscommunication with travel agencies, our tickets were not confirmed, and we were told that there were no available seats for us. We were obviously pretty upset, (although part of me hoped that we would just get stuck in Chitwan for a few days) but somehow they found room for us on a bus, then dropped us off at the next town to catch another bus--where we were crammed into the very back seat with a couple of other tourists whose tickets had also been overbooked. Needless to say, the ride home was not a nice one, and was severely bouncy--a personal assault to the skeleton. But hey, we got home safely, and that is what matters. Thankfully the actual vacation made up for the not-so-pleasant parts. It was a phenomenal experience!


the resort garden



elephants' bath time



the quiet morning river


on the canoe


traditional clay home


rhinos!

Prayer for 2009

We have found our way through the Advent season, a time when as Christians we wait for the hope that we know is coming. And as 2008 ends and a new year begins, we are still very much waiting for this hope to be realized. As I write these words, bombs are killing people in Gaza, war is being threatened between India and Pakistan, and in my own neighborhood here in Kathmandu, people are hungry. With these images threatening to overshadow the promise that Christmas has brought, I offer this simple prayer for the New Year.

Creator God,

We live in a world that often forgets it was created by you,

We pollute the air you give us to breathe,

We abuse the soil from which you give us food,

With hands that you shaped, we injure and even kill our sisters and brothers,

Through eyes that you formed, we see differences and inequalities,

We use our minds, that you designed, to create unjust systems,

We raise our voices to secure our own rights and freedoms,

You created our hearts for compassion, instead we fill them with greed.

 

With the coming of a new year, help us to imagine new possibilities,

Let us plant trees so the world can breathe,

Let us honor the land as a gift from you,

With our hands, let us embrace our enemies,

Through our eyes, let us see the beauty in each other,

Let us use our minds to create new ways of living,

Let us raise our voices out of concern for the poor,

Fill our hearts with a love that will sustain us throughout this year.